Float on all you Angels
Settle in your mothers hearts
Today we remember those in our lives who have lost their children.
I cherish each day I spent with you
Each day I grew with you.
Today we remember the children we lost. We will never feel their gentle touch, or hear the sweetest voice. Today we remember the lives we hoped for, and the souls we long for.
Today I remember my friends who have suffered the loss of much wanted children. I hope they find peace. Today I remember my angel. Today I remember the angels of my dear friends.
But today I also want to remember, to share. We are not broken. Those who have not felt this pain will not know how to treat us. They may shy away. They may say the wrong thing. Do not fault them, for they don't know. I hope they never know. And for those of you who have not been here. The best thing to do, is let us cry, scream, yell, or ignore it. The best thing to say is "I'm so sorry" because, there are no words. There is nothing, anyone can ever say that will make us feel better.
Tonight, at 7 pm, light a candle for the losses of your little angels. I will, and I will think of all of you.
My Story
"A New House! A New Baby!" I kept hearing it from friends because we'd just bought our house! This was in April of 2004. About a month I had a positive pregnancy test in my hand!
At my first appointment something was wrong. The baby was too small for me to have the right dates. But we were charting to avoid pregnancy so I knew my dates were correct.
This lead to another appointment. I took a friend, and this time we could see that the baby had grown, but was still too small to measure the heartbeat. We could see that the heart was fluttering, or at least moving.
2 more weeks. Waiting. One evening I was spotting. I took myself to the ER. They wouldn't even look. "Go see your doctor" they said.
I go see the doctor, 2 days later. I took the husband. "I'm sorry" they said. I couldn't even cry. Not yet at least.
I opted not to have the DNC, I didn't want to risk any scarring that may inhibit the birth of our next live child. I miscarried 2 days later. It was more physically painful than our sons birth, and even more painful that the very fast birth of our daughter. Who would have though. I ended up in the ER again for too much blood loss.
Halia was born on August 4, 2004.
Settle in your mothers hearts
Today we remember those in our lives who have lost their children.
I cherish each day I spent with you
Each day I grew with you.
Today we remember the children we lost. We will never feel their gentle touch, or hear the sweetest voice. Today we remember the lives we hoped for, and the souls we long for.
Today I remember my friends who have suffered the loss of much wanted children. I hope they find peace. Today I remember my angel. Today I remember the angels of my dear friends.
But today I also want to remember, to share. We are not broken. Those who have not felt this pain will not know how to treat us. They may shy away. They may say the wrong thing. Do not fault them, for they don't know. I hope they never know. And for those of you who have not been here. The best thing to do, is let us cry, scream, yell, or ignore it. The best thing to say is "I'm so sorry" because, there are no words. There is nothing, anyone can ever say that will make us feel better.
Tonight, at 7 pm, light a candle for the losses of your little angels. I will, and I will think of all of you.
My Story
"A New House! A New Baby!" I kept hearing it from friends because we'd just bought our house! This was in April of 2004. About a month I had a positive pregnancy test in my hand!
At my first appointment something was wrong. The baby was too small for me to have the right dates. But we were charting to avoid pregnancy so I knew my dates were correct.
This lead to another appointment. I took a friend, and this time we could see that the baby had grown, but was still too small to measure the heartbeat. We could see that the heart was fluttering, or at least moving.
2 more weeks. Waiting. One evening I was spotting. I took myself to the ER. They wouldn't even look. "Go see your doctor" they said.
I go see the doctor, 2 days later. I took the husband. "I'm sorry" they said. I couldn't even cry. Not yet at least.
I opted not to have the DNC, I didn't want to risk any scarring that may inhibit the birth of our next live child. I miscarried 2 days later. It was more physically painful than our sons birth, and even more painful that the very fast birth of our daughter. Who would have though. I ended up in the ER again for too much blood loss.
Halia was born on August 4, 2004.
1 comment:
love you...
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